心

心的尺寸大小是不可能相同
即使是左右两边都不一样
当一颗心存有真爱的时候
它的大小已不是一个问题

心虽然只有拳头般小
可是里面的空间有宇宙般大
把这扇心门打开
再把心房装满无数的爱

心是不会完整的
即使有丑陋的瑕疵
爱的力量可以包容一切
只能见到它完美的光辉

后记：
又是在收拾房间无意中发现的字条，其实也忘了写给谁或什么时候写的。
多年前青涩的我，想法如此单纯；多年后成长的我，还可以如此潇洒吗？
越简单的道理越需要时间的磨练，智慧的领悟，人生的经验。
希望到时 爱，还是很简单。。。

收拾

该准备了。

再过四天将出国游学。已把衣服装进我大大的粉红紫色旅行箱。还有些琐碎事要烦。

刚在收拾房间， 偶然发现了很多以前的回忆，也意外的找到许多废物。原来我那么爱收垃圾 -.- |||
找到了很多收据，小卡片，文具，账单，日记本，手工艺品，大学笔记，成绩单，医药报告，电池，药物，值得珍藏的照片，还有我以前写的诗等等。。。（我只收拾书桌和一边书柜。明天一定又有新发现）

收着，拾着，还有点女儿待嫁的心情。不是我恨嫁啦！只是感觉上，好像我要嫁出去，再也不住在这间房间。
它不属于我了。依依不舍：（

我不喜欢分离的感觉。当然世间没有不散之筵席。
其实我有很多东西都不敢，不舍得丢。即使没用处，也要留下来。搞得垃圾越堆越多，灰尘满房飞。
我拥有的东西还真不少。现在可头疼了。
还有点像我对感情的态度。

可是，要不是这些垃圾，我也忘了我是怎么活到今天。人是善忘的动物。我承认我是经典中的经典；极品中的极品。我真的把很多回忆给忘了。可能我患有失忆，或选择性记忆？

很多时候，我也把原来的自己给忘了。我是谁？这是我最想寻找的答案。

是逃避吗？或许吧！我在寻找什么？应该是最简单的我，最原始的我。

近年来，可能人老了，懂的事多了，反而弄不清自己是谁。好笑吧！
城市诱惑，社会观念，影响思想。金钱会很容易满足我小小虚荣心；可是内心的空虚越来越深。
是只有我一个人奇怪，还是有人和我一样？（开始怀疑自己。。。）
怎么搞的呢？
唉，可悲又可笑。

所以，我决定展开两年寻找自我的旅途。为我加油打气吧！：）

Inspirational

What does Height says about me

What Your Height Says About You

You are a gifted communicator, and you understand other people well. You are compassionate and empathetic. You feel other's pain a little too easily. Because of your open heart and open mind, many people admire and adore you. You are classy and well mannered. You have the art of charm mastered. You are about as tall as the average Mexican woman.

What Does Your Height Say About You?

-- I'll always proud to be my size! Don't tease me people! muahaha --

What Lee Aik Hooi means...

What Leeaikhooi Means

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow. You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily. Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is. You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone. You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together. At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together. You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection. You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive. You have the classic “Type A” personality. You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing. You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long. You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start. You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life. You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don't spill secrets or spread gossip. People sometimes think you're snobby or aloof, but you're just too deep in thought to pay attention to them. You are truly an original person. You have amazing ideas, and the power to carry them out. Success comes rather easily for you... especially in business and academia. Some people find you to be selfish and a bit overbearing. You're a strong person. You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life. You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you. At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Baby - 爱情不能做比较

车子里收音机空气中还飘着雨
在这个深夜里你应该在他那里
有多久没再遇见你
房里没了你的气息
而我终于扔掉了你给我的所有东西

我可以填满了生活里每寸空隙
我知道不容易但我仍试着继续
听说你比从前开心
我还能有怎样的情绪
除了祝福我不想再多说一句

他很好 他多好
这些我并不需要知道
再难忘掉多狂烈的拥抱
这回忆他也给不到
他多好 和我不同的好
最后是谁不重要
因为我知道
爱情不能做比较

就算是今天换一个人依靠
明天谁又比谁好
爱看不到听不到怎么做比较

别再说他很好他多好
这些我并不想要知道
再难忘掉多狂烈的拥抱
这回忆他也给不到
他多好 和我不同的好
最后是谁不重要
因为我知道 爱情不能做比较
希望你知道 爱情不能做比较

Fly Away - Corrinne May

"When will you be home?" she asks
as we watch the planes take off
We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead
She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled
As a child, she was my world
And now to let me go, I know she bleeds
and yet she says to me

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

Autumn leaves fell into spring time and
Silver-painted hair
Daddy called one evening saying
"We need you. Please come back"
When I saw her laying in her bed
Fragile as a child
Pale just like an angel taking flight
I held her as I cried

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
ohh...
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

六年

时光飞逝，转眼间已六年了。

六年，说短不短；长也不长。不过对一段分离六年的感情应该有很大的变化吧！
连拥抱都变质了？眼神少了温柔？
曾经我们是多么的单纯，快乐。 享受着所为“纯纯的爱”，也有点“蠢蠢”：P
相信这辈子再也找不回这一种感觉，也找不到像你的人了。
虽然在一起的时间很短暂，可是我们的回忆是丰富的。
我呀，从来没那么认真地爱过，没那么严重地受伤过。都是你的错！
回想起来，还真傻呀！

命运好像对我们开了玩笑？ 在错的时间遇到对的人--也只能怪缘份不够。
其实真的很想谢谢你。
给了我如此幸福的日子，满足了我一颗年少情怀，情痘初开的心。
美化了我当年对爱情的憧憬。
（当然现在的我，已被现实生活“污染”了。希望还可以保持赤子之心）
还好还收着很多珍藏品，信件和日记。当年差点把它们丢了。
现在得空可以拿出来回味回味还不错嘛。哈哈！
有一丝丝甜甜，一点点酸酸；加上一些些苦涩，一滴滴浪漫，
串成满满属于你我的回忆。

今天，我们终于有机会把埋藏心底深处的回忆挖了起来。
心里有种莫名的感触，感动。。。
许多忘了的往事，突然历历在目。唉，时间过得真快。
想念当年无忧无虑的日子，两小无猜，太可爱了！
虽然我们感慨叙说过去，幸运的是我们还是彼此珍惜对方，
不管大家变得怎么样，我相信我们的感情是不会变！
你说：一对分手的男女应该成为世界上最好的朋友。
因为大家曾经爱过，最了解对方，也一起度过珍贵的时光，
虽然不能开花结果，一切只好随缘。
我说：情侣可能会分手，朋友却是永远的！：）

可能我成长了，人老了。早已失去了这种单纯的快乐，也忘了淡淡爱情的幸福。
问世间情为何物？我还是一只在寻找的lost soul.

风，谢谢你的一切一切。永远爱你！

James Blunt - You're Beautiful

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Flying high,
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.

Graduation

What do you think of graduation?

An end to studying life? Freedom? No more boring lectures and tons of assignments?

Well. Finally, I graduate 'officially' and attended my convocation on Sunday (after 11 long months of waiting). Like PY said: no mood for graduation. It has been so long...

Right. No more excitements, feeling of freedom, enthusiastic to conquer the world. Ish. Sorry. Takde sikit pun. Has been working and seeing the 'real' world for too long. Already used to working life and langsung not excited about work. *imagining* teaching kids middle C for the 10000 x n times, beating my thigh really loud (until painful) so that they can hear the pulse..

Ish. Working life sucks.

*stop stop stop* no more bad thoughts about my working life. It's not all the time that bad la. (if not everyone will be thinking why I still want to teach when I hate it so much.) Anyway, it's nice to meet my old friends after 11 months. A lot of stories to catch up, about 'working life' (again!), teaching methods, complaining parents and bosses, salary not enough, teacher burn out, further study, even marriage! .. oh ya.. and also about my CGPA... !@#$#$ Don't ask la... heartbreak only.. haih..

Well.. this is life.. Most of my classmates are teaching back in their hometown, some digging gold in Singapore, I guess only me and PY very enthusiastic in further study. Talking about this, I really need to further study. I don't think my degree is sufficient and has prepared me for the 'real' world. Don't even feel like a graduate student. Bachelor degree only what. Nothing so keng also. There are tons of people like me outside. How to compete? Life is cruel. *sob sob* It's always a dilemma whether to continue studies or not. study = spend money + no income; work = got money + stress + lifeless

The good news is I got a reply from professor at WVU. Finally.. wait until my neck also long. But, still no news. too bad. Hopefully I can get THE great news soon.. *waiting waiting..patience patience*

~C'est la vie

p/s - these photos are meant to make karen jealous. muahaha!

Help! @#$%&*%()

@#$%^*%#)%!@(#%$#$&%U$(&$)@#$!@#%)^#!@#_%$#($^&%_&)!+@)~*!(#&%$@ #_$^~!@#@#%(@)#$^($#!)@)~(!)@*$(@&#$)^(#_!)*~(!&#%($ #_&)^_&*$(()@~!!!!

Very sorry. That's a long list of vulgar language. *deep breathe*

I need to calm down. Got a bad headache now. Forgive me if I'm speaking weirdly or insanely or nonsense.. But I can't stand it! In a bad mood today. Scolded my students. I only started teaching at 7.15pm today. So my working hours is 7.15-10.15pm for today. You must be thinking, aiyah, 3 hours only mah. so short.. syok la.. WALAUEHHH!!! You are so wrong!

Within this 3 hours I need to face 6 students, not to mention controlling other kids whose running around and screaming. Ok. I admit, I am very fierce and I cannot stand kids running and screaming. I will get sooooo irratated and my temper just blew off. I have my job pressure too!!!

In a month's time I have 18 students taking exams? I lost count myself. 3 theory students taking exam on 1 Nov and the rest taking piano exams end of the month. Everybody is so not ready! Help me! I only see them once a week, what can you expect me to do? miracles?! Especially parents. I only meet your child for 1 hour a week, you see your kids all the time. Can't you do something to help them or make them practice?! You think you pay me then expect me to do all the work for you? Excuse me, I'm responsible to TEACH your kids how to play the piano and how to appreciate music. I'm NOT a metronome to keep time, I'm NOT an alarm clock keep reminding your child to WAKE UP, most importantly I'm NOT their parents! I know being an educator is not easy. I always tell myself to be patient, to be more friendly, to be calm, to be nice, to be cool, to be flexible, to love, to teach. I'm a human too, teachers are not God.

I'm becoming a 'cheong hei' ah por now. I can SEE myself in that state of madness, messy hair, grumpy face, shouting, pounding fist and jumping up and down in anger. I don't want to be like that. I know I'm getting a teacher burned out. I always get that every few months. I don't have space to breath. Sometimes I really hope that I don't see my students. Just GO AWAY! LEAVE! I DON'T WANT TO SEE ANY OF YOUR FACES!!!!

I always believe that I can do more than being an ordinary piano teacher. Teach you read ABCDEFG, sing Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Do, count 1234. That is just the basic. More importantly, I think being an educator is to educate, not teach. There's difference. Sometimes I rather waste a whole lesson not teaching piano but understanding my student. Give counselling sessions, knowing their background, love them for who they are no matter how gifted or how problematic they are, sharing their secrets, giving advice (from love, fashion, studies, latest movies or games, future career), showing them their talent and appreciating their positive traits. Oh, God knows how much an educator can do.

I cannot be a perfect person, neither a perfect teacher. I always feel bad after scolding, who enjoy being angry and looks like an ugly old witch? I know I shouldn't have lost my temper, I'll try my best next time. Lately, I realise my own problem, I lose temper easily. Haih. I guess I need to regenerate myself and cleanse my soul a bit. I need to sit down and think, what are the best ways to cure these children. Most of them have the same problem. Kids nowadays are very difficult to teach. I face the same problem EVERYDAY. If I continue working like that, I guess my life will be shortened at least 10%.

OK. Feeling slightly better after releasing my stress here. No wonder there's an article saying that writing blog is actually good for mental health. I hope I can have a good sleep tonight. Another long day tomorrow. Hope it'll be a better one.

~ To learn is to teach, to teach is to learn~

Just for fun ~

First and foremost, I would like to mention that this posting has no connection to business. I'm not doing product selling, sales, promotion, sales, marketing or commercial.
It's just pure sharing my personal belongings and stuffs that I have. Appreciating the stuffs I bought, gifts from friends; at least a memorial for them before they are gone :p

If anyone wants to know more details about the product can ask me personally.

Ok, now you can proceed to see my prize possessions.


<< ~ Bathing time

Smoothy soft skin ~ >>

<<~ Who's the fairest of them all

Campur campur ~ >>

These are part of my assets only. Still have more, but lazy to dig all out to take photo. My table's now a mess. Anyway, suddenly I realized I have so many things, only daily essentials only. (not including make up things) Don't waste, don't waste. hehe. You must be thinking I must be having so much free time to pamper myself everyday, then you are absolutely wrong! I like to buy, but i'm very lazy to remind myself to use it everyday. haha. I just used them once in a blue moon. When I have the mood, or when I become conscious of my outlook (eg: pimples, hair messy, skin too dry) See la.. ish ish..

Cute baby Jun Wei

As promised, I took photo of this baby Jun Wei (Sorry if I spelt wrongly) this morning while i was teaching. curi curi.. hehe. He is so adorable. After I snap his picture then I showed him, he was so excited pointing to the photo and said 'di di'.. hahaha.. aiyoooooo... sayang betul.....

p/s - I wonder if his parents found out I posted his son's picture on my blog they'll sue me or not..erm..I'm not paparazzi..!!

Faded Memoirs of Life

I was chit-chating with my mum after dinner. Told her about this cuttttteeee little boy that accompanied his siblings to my boss's music school. He's only a year and a half, learning to speak. SOooooooOOOoooo adorable!! Everytime he sees me, he'll call me 'jie jie' in excitement. I really melt to my knees. sayanggggggg!! Today, he showed his forehead with mosquito bite, he was like:" mokito bie, mokito bie" Aiyooooo, he's really a darling!! (I'll see if i can snap a photo of him, if i see him tomorrow..hehe..)

So, I asked my mum about how was I during my baby years. According to her, I have a head of hair (like mop) when I was born, chubby face, big head, looks like a baby boy more than a girl (well, i'm still rough as a boy now, haha!), round eyes like grapes, a disasterous cry baby, and I teeth and speak faster than my brother (haha, slow poke). Oh ya, and I do not pass through the crawling stage, straight away short cut, learn to stand. Keng leh! (but, I read an article somewhere saying that it's actually not good to miss the crawling stage...how am I suppose to know?!) Besides that, I'm a very stubborn little girl, especially eminent after my brother's birth.

To prove her words, I dug out the old photographs from the cupboard to see my baby photos. Poor photos, neglected for awhile. Anyway, not only I found my old baby photos, I found my parent's marriage photos, grandma's photo, dating photos and photos of their younger days. Everything is sOOOooo hilarious!! I mean it! It's really funny to see people that time. I was like looking at P Ramlee movie while browsing through the photos. The fashion and the cars during seventies and eighties, so cool!! Even my mum wore super mini skirts and platform shoes (and she's discouraging me to wear that now..duh..) and of course, my dad in agogo pants and big tinted glasses. Oh ya, not to forget their hairstyle. haha. My mum had big afro hairs and my dad had wavy hair like Elvis. My god..*pengsan* I really really cannot imagine how. I even asked my mum, what is it that you see in dad. She said she don't know. haha!

It's really ironic that we were laughing at the old memories and the funny poses. But everything seems just like yesterday. Ah, time flies. Good times wait for no men. Life moves on. Appreciating and living life to the fullest is my motto. I'm sure I can hear faint laughter from my children teasing my old photographs in the near future.

That's right, it was the good old days...

婆媳问题

刚才在电视看了男女两性话题的节目。 觉得今天的题目很精彩,也很现实 -- 就是婆媳问题。

曾经也看过妈妈和婆婆的不和; 朋友家庭的问题; 电视剧婆媳纠纷的剧情... 婆媳问题可见是一个非常普遍的issue, 在每个人的生活里一定会面对的事。难道婆媳纠纷是不能解决的吗? 婆媳纠纷到底是谁的错? 该怪男人还是女呢？

在此声明，本小姐还未嫁人,也未能亲身理解这个问题 (更不希望有这种问题!), 所以找来了这篇很有意思的文章与大家分享，转自深圳婚姻咨询网。

婆媳问题是中国最具传统与历史的家庭问题，三四千年来，每个朝代、每个家庭似乎或多或少都受到这问题的困扰。而如何处置这个问题？传统上对这类问题的教导并不多，反而只有一些消极性的说词如：“清官难断家务事”、“天下无不是的父母”、“忍”、“眼不见为净”等类的话，于事无辅。由于时代的变迁，加上欧美家庭观念的不断输入，小家庭的普遍流行，我们发现婆媳问题在最近十几年来已不象往昔那么严重，用各地辅导机构的个案统计中，我们可以看到这种倾向。然而，婆媳问题对很多家庭仍然带来莫大的困扰，我们先分析婆媳问题发生的原因，再来谈婆媳问题的处置。

婆媳问题产生的原因，可以归纳为下列几点：

1、角色间的适应不良。 在婚前，有两组角色彼此不相冲突：男与女，母与子。男孩在谈恋爱的过程中，不管对女孩有多好，在妈妈的心目中只是一个“儿子的择偶”过程，所以妈妈多半是乐观其成。对女孩而言，恋爱时男友的体贴当然让他意乱情迷，此时她也看不到与婆婆之间未来可能的冲突。 对男人而言，婚前的角色：一方面是女友的恋人，另一方面是妈妈的孝子两种角色，很难同时面面俱到。但是婚后两个角色马上会变化，这位男士所娶的“太太”也同时是家中婆婆的“媳妇”，对新婚的太太而言是个很大的挑战。男人的立场也很尴尬，他必须是个爱太太而且有男人气概的“先生”，同时也应该是如同往昔般即听话又孝顺的“儿子”。婆婆呢？她可能丧失了家中的权威女性的地位，而眼睁睁的看着自己的儿子受到一个“外来女子”的左右。婆媳问题之所以复杂乃根源于这种角色的冲突中，很难同时摆平这三方面的压力。

2、爱的竞争与威胁 从“爱的本质”来分析，一个男人对母亲的孝顺与对太太的爱两种性质是不同的。问题是太太与母亲却不易看清这个事实，对他们而言，这种冲突并不是爱的本质的类别差异，而是“爱的对象”被掠夺的问题。妻子与母亲要这个男人属于她、听她的话，若对对方态度不好反而更佳，因为这代表男人将更属于她。这也是为什么男人在太太与母亲之间很难取舍的原因，同时也是婆媳之间需要退回的功课。她们必须学习如何成全自己所爱的“对象”，好让他能满足对对方的“本质爱”，这种对对方“本质爱”的满足并不意味着自己爱的失落，或是自己的爱受到掠夺的威胁。而是一种爱的成全。简而言之，当儿子爱太太时，婆婆不必认为“娶了一个媳妇，失去一个儿子”；当先生孝顺婆婆时，太太更千万不必有“先生并不完全属于我”的干醋思想。

3、传统婆媳观念不原略做修正。 女性的角色中所谓的三从四德虽然未包括对婆婆的顺服，但是从传统中我们不难发现，女性的三从不难，第四从才难。婆婆在娶了媳妇以后，家中的地位已跃了一级，从此以后家中的苦差事有人代劳，若再加上“绝对顺服，不容拂逆”的观念，现代女性很少有人能经得起这种“传统”任务的挑战。 此外，或许婆婆以前当媳妇时吃过苦，也挨的起苦，现在自己当婆婆，偶而略对媳妇施加压力，本身也视之为当然，这是一种“隔代报复”的心理现象（当时不敢对婆婆报复，现在则对媳妇要求苛刻）。并且，时下常有一些新女性，自视高人一等，根本不把婆婆看在眼里，更谈不上孝顺或服侍公婆了。因此，婆媳问题当然难免产生了。

4、家庭中先生、太太与婆婆之间的沟通不良。 婆媳纠纷不一定从“大事”引起的，若是沟通不良，鹅毛蒜皮的小事也可能引爆大冲突。比如，儿子结婚度完蜜月回家时已是深夜，隔天的早餐到底该女个女人来准备？婆婆认为媳妇已经进门几天了，理所当然，应该是媳妇起来做早点，那知媳妇因一夜劳累，而且刚进家门还不习惯要起床服侍全家大小。。。等等诸如此类的小事，若正式的明讲可能让人觉得小题大做，但是不讲清楚却又会造成夫妻误会。谁来讲？怎么讲？都是值得注意的事。

5、男人的处置不当。 在两个女人当中，男人既要“摆平”又要“安抚”，的确不是一件易事，但是并非完全没有办法。很多男人常说：“妈妈只有一个，太太可以再娶”，不分青红皂白，当然太太会受不了。此外，有人以为反正妻子与母亲之间只能爱一个的观念也不甚妥当，在处理太太与母亲之间的争执时，常常因为这种毫无弹性的解释与处置，使得事情日趋恶化。若是他能分析对方的需要，消除产生误会的症结，则家中的婆媳纠纷必可减少。

解决方法：有关婆媳纠纷的处理，必须从婆婆、媳妇与先生三方面同时着手，而且密切配合才能达成。

1、婆婆应注意的事项。

A、在观念上，婆婆首先应该认识到，惟有儿子与媳妇切实相爱才是家庭幸福的主要关键，而不是儿子的孝顺与否。 在此笔者无意贬低家庭中长辈的尊严与价值，乃是从家庭的结构与特质来分析。若是儿子与媳妇不合，受苦的不只是两个人，更波及到无辜的下一代，而公公婆婆也必然是个受害者。如果媳妇被儿子“休掉”或是两个人闹的不可开交，尽管儿子十分孝顺，也是一种悲剧。简而言之，公婆自求多福最好的方法就是设法鼓励，使儿子与媳妇相爱。

B、让儿子独立作主，不要干涉他们夫妻之间的事。 倘若儿子很听媳妇的话，当婆婆的必觉得难受，因为这不是一件坏事，只要家庭和谐、正常，无论是媳妇顺服儿子，或是儿子听从媳妇都无妨，因为没有任何一个女人会故意陷害自己的先生，当媳妇比儿子还能干时，应为儿子庆幸娶到这么擅长管理家政的太太，千万不要为儿子抱不平。

C、主动与媳妇沟通、分工合作处理家事。 媳妇家事如果做得不够理想或媳妇过于懒散，婆婆可以善意的列出应处理的家事项目，提醒媳妇，诸如谁买菜、谁洗碗、谁清扫、谁看小孩。。等。这种事先的沟通虽然有点怪，但总比存着“不必我说你本来就应该知道”的心理要好。万一家事已分配得很清楚，而她因有特殊的状况不能做好时，主动协助她完成是相当重要的。这种“投资”必定在不久的将来得到更大的回报。

D、可能的话，不要与儿子和媳妇一起居住，婆婆将得到更多的尊重与孝顺。 若生活起居不需人照顾，而且两老自己也有安居之地时，则不妨自己居住，倒也可乐得清净。若嫌寂寞，可以去探望儿孙，或转移情怀至宗教活动、参与慈善团体等社会服务工作，也不失为一种自享清福的方法。

2、媳妇应该注意的事项。

A、须有主动的孝顺行为。 孝顺公婆若只随着先生去“行礼如仪”是不够的，她必须积极、主动到让公婆感受到是媳妇自己在孝顺公婆，甚至比儿子还更孝顺，要不然就谈不上行为的积极功能。时上年轻女性最大的问题是她们把孝顺公婆当作是一种可以随便应付了事的行为，当然无法得到婆婆的欢心，更甭想婆婆视媳妇如同自己的女儿了。

B、须“强化”孝顺公婆的“具体行为” 爱在心头口难开是不够的，孝顺公婆远比孝顺父母更需要具体的孝顺行为。尤其在新婚阶段，媳妇对婆婆口头上的问候、生活起居的服侍，更不能大意。一直等到公婆对媳妇印象良好，或是已有很深的感情基础时，不妨再加强与公婆之间的心灵沟通，比如意见的交换、感受的分享等。若是一进婆家，就忽略了具体孝顺行为的重要性，而光重心灵的互动，有时效果不是很好。

C、顺服心的培养。 在时间的条件上，太太对先生应有十足的信心，不必提防婆婆会取代你自己的地位。有时候，抓住先生的心最好的方法并不是紧迫盯人，而是成全他、鼓励他多听父母亲的话；委屈自己，不必太强调自我的意见。有时我们会发现，只要自己贤惠，不怕大家不尊重你、听从你。反之，若是只知一味的逞强、或是争风吃醋，使彼此的关系愈来愈疏远，反而是得不偿失的。

3、先生方面应注意的事项。 婆媳纠纷的处理，最主要的人物莫过去先生了。他应注意的原则如下：

A、扮演一个好的“中间者”，不要偏袒任何一方。 不必一味的叫太太顺服妈妈，当然也不可以让妈妈失去它应有的尊严。在婆媳纠纷中，他不必评断谁是谁非、谁赢谁输，他最主要的工作应是做双方的代言人，解释或表达彼此之间的善意（即使是恶意也要设法转换，并且说服当事者，使之变成善意）。换句话说，“中间者”就是要设法消除婆媳间的误会，传递婆媳间的正面情谊。千万不要让婆媳间有“一赢一输，一生一死”的关系形态。

B、行为上以父母为第一，内心中则是太太至上。 理想中的家庭应该是夫妻相爱异常，两人同心协力好好孝顺双亲、公婆。若此境界不能达成时，则不妨设法说服太太，两个人在某些行为上有相当的默契，共同孝顺双亲。当然先生必须有对太太爱的保证，强调爱她的忠心，并请求她以爱丈夫之心来爱公婆。

C、生活习惯上难保持夫妻间的隐秘性，但家庭活动中不要忘了让父母亲共同来参与。 女人最受不了的可能就是她与先生之间没有隐秘性，而偏偏很多先生总是主动的向父母亲报告大小难事。无论如何先生与太太之间应有一段时间、某个场合、某些事情是绝对属于夫妻两人自己的，此时可以让两人有更多感情的交流、情绪的宣泄，及事务上的讨论。对于某些社交、旅行、郊游等活动，有时候也应该邀请父母亲共同参与，而不把老迈的双亲一直当作负担，否则父母亲会成为被儿子媳妇刻意孤立的一员。换个角度而言，为人公婆的若能体谅儿子媳妇的状况，让他们多点时间私下相处，也不失为是赢取他们情感的方法。当然每家情况互异，重点亦有所不同，不可一概而论。

总之，任何方法与技巧并不一定能立刻奏效，如果彼此间不能相爱的话。若是大家都能彼此相爱，注意以上提到的技巧与步骤，凡事体谅、忍耐到底的话，假以时日，对方必会感动而改变的。即使对方不能如愿受感动改变，只要心存无愧的良心，我们也就不必太过自责了。

后记：我未来的老公，记得要读这篇文章，醒目点啦！哈哈 ;)

My sunshine's birthday

Yesterday was my life partner's birthday. As promised, I will give her the birthday present virtually this year. Hope you like this.

It’s your birthday, my dear Phung
Birthday song from heart I sung
I want to wish you all the best
Sit down and enjoy all the rest

Grab a glass of sparkly wine
A toast to the very fine
First to your friendship and to mine
They will forever remain divine

Turn the music and let’s dance
To celebrate this day of fun
Turn and swirl and shake our butts
Laugh our heads off ‘til we’re nuts

Not to miss our favorite task
Oh, no it’s not about facial mask
Eat a hearty scrumptious meal
Is what we always had for a deal

Of course you need a birthday cake
A real large one to accommodate
Flames of candles blazed up high
They will take you to cloud nine

This poem is specially written to celebrate
Though you are miles apart from me, my mate
To you my darling sunshine friend
Hope our friendship never ends.

Happy 24th Birthday Karen Phung!

路

时间
是交通警察
指示你
适合的时候
就该走

犹豫
是三岔路口
那一刻
做了决定
就不回头

挫折
是走错路
改天
再也不犯
同一个错误

巴士
可以载我
到各个角落
最终
还是回到原点

人生的旅途
经过大大小小
的道路
其实
哪一条才是
回家的路？

Celebrity Morph by MyHeritage

MyHeritage: Family trees - Genealogy - Celebs

Choices

Life is about choices.

You choose what to eat - KFC/McD?
You choose what to wear - skirt/pants?
You choose what colour - red/blue?
You choose what to study - medical/engineering?
You choose where to go - England/China?
You choose which car to drive - Proton/BMW?
You choose which band to listen - Aerosmith/Linkin park?
You choose which hairdresser to go to - X saloon/Y saloon?
You choose which party to vote – BN/DAP?
You choose how to travel - bus/train?
You choose how to spend your day off - sleep/outing?

But, above all of the choices that we make every day, the most difficult (for me) would be...
Choice of LOVE...

Agree?

Someone told me: there’s neither good choice or bad choice; nor right choice or wrong choice in this world. There’s only choosing the best choice.

This phrase gave me very much impact when I deal with choices. However, when it comes to love, I still think it’s easier said than done.

I guess there’re a few criteria in love before you have the chance of making decision. As the Chinese old saying 天时,地利,人和 which means right timing, right place and right person. Without any of the three criteria, love will not work.

Let’s do some calculation:
Right timing + right place + wrong person = obviously no chemistry
Right timing + wrong place + right person = too bad
Wrong timing + right place + right person = regrets, sad case

Well, we can go on forever by doing the equations, but it’s unsolvable. All of them will give a negative answer.

So if you passed the timing and place and right person. Congratulations, you have reached the final step: to decide whether you want to be with that person or not.

On the other hand, what if right timing + right place + (n>1) right person?

My, my.. the maths is getting tougher. That’s why I say choices in love are very difficult. Get what I mean now?

You still passed the timing and place and right person, but you have the choice to opt for A or B. A and B both has unique attributes and you like both of them; sometimes you’ll wish to blend them both to create a perfect human being. Nevertheless, there’s no perfection in this world. So, still stuck at the part of picking the best person. Remember, as I’ve mentioned at the beginning: there’s neither good choice or bad choice; nor right choice or wrong choice in this world. There’s only selecting the best choice. But how?

I’ve thought through thoroughly. (Hehe, for fun, try reading that in high speed!) If two of them have the unique characteristics which you liked and it’s painful to make decision. In my opinion, turn the ball around and be selfish! Choose the one that bring the best out of you.
Loving a person and choosing to be with the person is two different things. Loving a person can be a single direction, but choosing to be with the one is a process of matching, blending, fitting, merging, joining, integrating, combining, unifying, amalgamating! So much of chemistry needed for this complexity.

Now, let’s talk about some chemistry:
1 independent excellent atom + 1 individual superior atom = ? molecule

There are many possibilities, depending on the quality of each atom and characteristics after the combination. Therefore, it depends whether you want to create venomous potion, or extraordinary concoction. That’s what I mean about choosing the best person that can bring the best out of you. I hope you understand what I’m trying to say.

Alas, if love is as easy as mathematics or chemistry…

張震岳+蔡健雅 - 思念是一種病

當你在穿山越嶺的另一邊
我在孤獨的路上沒有盡頭

一輩子有多少的來不及　發現　已經　失去
最重要的東西　恍然大悟　早已遠去
為何總是在犯錯之後　才肯相信　錯的是自己　他們說這就是人生
試著體會　試著忍住眼淚
還是躲不開應該有的情緒　我不會奢求世界停止轉動
我知道逃避一點都沒有用
只是這段時間裡 尤其在夜裡　還是會想起
難忘的事情　我想我的思念是一種病
久久不能痊癒

＊當你在穿山越嶺的另一邊
我在孤獨的路上沒有盡頭
時常感覺你在耳後的呼吸
卻未曾感覺你在心口的鼻息

汲汲營營　忘記身邊的人需要
愛和關心　借口總是拉遠了距離　不知不覺 無聲無息
我們總是在抱怨事與願違　 卻不願意回頭看看自己
想想自己到底做了什麼蠢事情　也許是上帝給我一個試煉
只是這傷口需要花點時間
只是會想念　過去的一切　 那些人事物 會離我遠去
而我們終究也會遠離 變成回憶

＊當你在穿山越嶺的另一邊
我在孤獨的路上沒有盡頭
時常感覺你在耳後的呼吸
卻未曾感覺你在心口的鼻息
oh~ 思念是一種病

oh~ 思念是一種病
一種病…..

多久沒有說我愛你
多久沒有擁抱 你所愛的人　當這個世界不再那麼美好
只有愛可以讓他更好　我相信一切都來得及
別管那些紛紛擾擾
別讓不開心的事 停下了腳步　就怕你不說　就怕你不做
別讓遺憾 繼續 一切都來得及

＊當你在穿山越嶺的另一邊　我在孤獨的路上沒有盡頭
時常感覺你在耳後的呼吸
卻未曾感覺你在心口的鼻息

＊當你在穿山越嶺的另一邊
我在孤獨的路上沒有盡頭
時常感覺你在耳後的呼吸
卻未曾感覺你在心口的鼻息
oh~ 思念是一種病

oh~ 思念是一種病
一種病…..

给自己的遗书 A will for yourself

Dearest Phungy,

I promised to feature you in this post. (sorry, kinda late ;p)

When I saw your last few writings, you were unhappy. Worried about you, gal. As you said before, you want to turn yourself into a new leaf. You should! Try not to write so much on negative stuffs. Well, not to say you cannot write, it's just that - life is beautiful! I think there are many wonderful things that you can share. At some point, you wouldn’t want to look back and only see pessimism in your life right?

Coincidently while I was driving home on the same night I read your miserable posting, a DJ was talking about ‘dealing unhappiness’ over the radio. She told a story (which I can’t really recall) and then she mentioned about writing yourself a will. I find this interesting. Whenever you are down, write the unpleasant incident, release your tantrums and your wishes in order to change the situation or hopes for the future. Write it like a will, as if there’s no tomorrow. Then throw or bury or burn the paper, as a symbol of death. When you’ve done that, the incident has gone, dead, left you, lifeless, deceased. Then, it’s a new beginning!

I hope you understand what I mean and I just want you to be happy ok?

Life is never a smooth journey
While we travel down the memory lane
It’s time to appreciate
The hardship is who we are today.

This appeared in someone dear’s blog:

"Life is beautiful because it's tough sometimes. Life is even more wonderful when you are enjoying every bit of it after the years of toughness."

Add oil!

Love,
Aiky

JS Bach's Partita #6 (Glenn Gould)

雨。

雨。

喜欢雨的声音。
有大的，有小的
有近的，有远的
有亮的，有暗的
有密的，有空的
像弹钢琴一样。

喜欢雨的感觉。
有重的，有轻的
有左的，有右的
有粗的，有细的
有急的，有缓的
像母亲拍打孩子入睡。

喜欢雨的味道。
有酸的，有咸的
有强的，有弱的
有涩的，有甘的
有浓的，有淡的
像新鲜的绿色生命。

喜欢雨的颜色。
有朦的，有清的
有深的，有浅的
有影的，有显的
有薄的，有厚的
像莫内特的水彩画。

雨，停了。

A Tale of Mari and Three Puppies

Ok. I have to admit.

This is the first movie that I cried from the beginning until the end. Non stop! Em, sorry, no. Not only that. I started to cry even when I watched the movie trailer. Keng leh!

(I'm actually typing this post with badly swollen eyes. Haih, tomorrow must stay home, better don't meet people, in case 吓死人!)

The movie is "A Tale of Mari and Three Puppies".

Adapted from the graphic novel Mari and the Three Puppies of Yamakoshi, the film is based on the true story of how a dog and her puppies survived the aftermath of the magnitude 6.9 Chuetsu Earthquake in 2004. The movie version is dramatized with added characters such as a little girl, Aya and her elder brother, Ryota. However the part where Mari helped saved her owner, an old grandfather is a fact and was well depicted in this movie.

General summary of the story goes like this. Yuichi, a village official of Yamakoshi, lives with his old father, Yuzo, his son, Ryota, and his daughter, Aya. One day a female puppy comes to live with them. They named it Mari. In 2004, Mari bears three puppies. It pleases the family, but their happiness ends all too soon. On October 23, a great earthquake destroys the village. Aya and her grandfather were caught under the fallen pillars, injured and unable to move. Mari managed to save her owners but Mari and her puppies were left behind. After many difficulties, the movie finally ends with happy reunion of Mari, her puppies and her owners.

Inspired by a true story of canine heroism, A Tale of Mari and Three Puppies is a touching story of love and resilience starring by cute child-stars and adorable dogs. Mari's tale of survival against all odds became a symbol of hope for the people of Yamakoshi in the aftermath of the earthquake, and was later turned into a best-selling illustrated book from which the film is adapted. A Tale of Mari and Three Puppies is helmed by television director Inomata Ryuichi and features music from renowned composer Hisaishi Joe.




I highly recommend this movie for dogs and animal lovers. Or if you want to cleanse your eyes and refresh your tear gland, please watch this movie. Some reminders and advices before you start to watch this movie. (My personal opinion, does not apply to all)

1) drink a lot of water before you start
2) get ready a roll or box of tissue paper
3) do not watch with a lot of people
4) don't need popcorn
5) prepare consealer

p/s - This photo is only to show how much tissue I actually used throughout the movie. I have some personal photos which I took as evidence on how badly I cried. I don't want to scare you away. So not posting that. haha!

Some scenes from the movie:

I think can download from this site. Try and let me know :)

http://www.crunchyroll.com/group/CRSeries_-_A_Tale_of_Mari_and_Three_Puppies_-_Movie

Bro's Birthday

Yesterday was an important day.

August 31st, 2008 is

1) Malaysia's 51st Independance Day

2) My brother's 20th Birthday

In order to celebrate the first meaningful occasion - Malaysia's 51st Independance day, I organized a masterclass (conducted by Shuenda) to torture my students. I went to DFP at KLCC to listen MPO's concert on Smetana's Ma Vlast (My motherland). And I have the chance to listen to the BEST Negaraku performance in my life. Felt partriotic for 2 seconds. hehe. Then, I went to 'Merdeka Karaoke Session' organized by rotarians to sing my heart out on my love of Malaysia. (duh!) We had a great time and sang from 6pm - 1am. Keng leh!

The second significant event - The birthday of my one and only genetically closest species in this world, dearestttttttttt littleeeeeeee brotherrrrrrrr! I can't celebrate with him (sob sob), he's like 300 miles away from me.. (Er, is Singapore 300 miles away from Klang? Just simply. hehe) Since I can't celebrate with Hong. Let me post up some 'presents' for you ah!

Oh, by the way, the superman shirt is from BIL to him. This is superman t-shirt v.2. 'Coz the first one was destroyed! Nice handiwork though!

My dear Hong, I know you love chocolate cake since young. (Hope you havent change your taste la) These are some of the best chocolate cakes that I googled. Can't send you a cake, so post some yummy looking chocolate cakes for you. Let you 望梅止渴. (shun bian attract and tempt Karen's tastebuds) Muahaha!

And of course, a cake with 20 candles.

Happy 20th birthday, Ah Hong!

Love you. Muaks!

- XOXO -

Rainbow

Red and yellow and pink and green, purple and orange and blue... la la la..

I think that's how I sang the rainbow song during kindergarten.

雨停了，雨停了，彩虹高高挂...

Then, during primary school days we sang 彩虹歌. If I'm not mistaken, can't really remember too.

High school days, we don't sing anymore rainbow song, but memorize the order of colors in the rainbow. So we used, "Michael Jackson kena halau balik India Utara", which stands for merah, jingga, kuning, hijau, biru, indigo, ungu.

The other day, my student played a song called 'Rainbow' from Alfred piano level 2. The suggested method to remember rainbow colors is "Roy G. Biv", as if a person's name, which actually stands for "red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet".

Of course, there are many songs that's related to rainbow. To name a few, "Over the rainbow" (my favourite!), Rainbow connection, I can sing a rainbow, The spectrum song, etc.."

Suddenly I felt that rainbow always has a close connection to me.

It has been raining for the past few weeks here, hardly see the bright warm sun. Weather is so unpredictable in Malaysia. I love raining. I love the scent of rain, the symphony of raindrops, the feeling of rain gently hitting my skin. However, only once is a blue moon that we have the chance to see rainbow.

Wikipedia: Rainbows are optical illusions and meteorological phenomena that cause a spectrum of light to appear in the sky when the Sun shines onto droplets of moisture in the Earth's atmosphere. They take the form of a multicoloured arc, with red on the outer part of the arch and violet on the inner section of the arch.

When I reach home after a heavy downpour a few days ago, I saw rainbow faintly in the distant sky. Quickly I grabbed by camera and start snapping. Rainbow always makes me believe there's 幸福.

Last two nights, I had a dream about rainbow too. I remember I am very very close the the rainbow, almost touching it, and the colors are shinning brightly. But something has cut across the rainbow (like mist or cloud), so the rainbow doesn't looks curvy but a part has disappeared. It was a very weird dream, but I know I felt happy.
Em, can anyone interpret my dream?

Rainbow Tears by A.J. McKinley

Through rainbow tears I see love's true colors
Shining bright amongst them above all others...
Red, Green, Yellow, violet and blue...
All these beautiful colors I now see in you.

Love is my pot of gold,
Forever within my grasp
All I need are open eyes
And a map to complete this task.

And the storm will come of this we know
And darkness soon calls the show
Around me a rainbow of tears have spent.
My pot of gold to you have went.

And miracle is the day I found
My rainbow tears scattered upon the ground
My heart forever now is glad
Leaving room for light to replace the sad.

And to the dearest most sacred spot
My rainbow tears your hand has caught.
In this bond we shall forever rest.
Two souls combined for the rainbow test.

领悟

辛晓琪-领悟

我以为我会哭
但是我没有
我只是怔怔望着你的脚步
给你我最后的祝福
这何尝不是一种领悟
让我把自己看清楚
虽然那共爱的痛苦
将日日夜夜
在我灵魂最深处
我以为我会报复
但是我没有
当我看到我深爱过的男人
竟然像孩子一样无助
这何尝不是一种领悟
让你把自己看清楚
被爱是奢侈的幸福
可惜你从来不在乎
啊!一段感情就此结束
啊!一颗心眼看要荒芜
我们的爱若是错误
愿你我没有白白受苦
若曾真心真意付出
就应该满足
啊!多么痛的领悟
你曾是我的全部
只是我回首来时路的每一步
都走的好孤独
啊!多么痛的领悟
你曾是我的全部
只愿你挣脱情的枷锁
爱的束缚任意追逐
别再为爱受苦

X.A.M

The fuss over Xam has finally reach double bar line.

It has been a week since Xam's appearance. Xam pronounced as /sæm/ (a.k.a Roger) is a Golden Retriever, approximately 7 months old (it's just my guess, but i know he's still a pup, not full grown yet). Last week while taking Max (A labrador retriever) for a walk, Xam turned up from no where. Xam was wet and stinky, must be lost for quite awhile. Then, he followed Max around, unwilling to leave. So, in the end got no choice but to take him home. Miraculously, Max befriended Xam instantly. Max is an unsocialized dog, he's a real loner. Anyway, they are excited with each other's company, but, to our surprise, no, more to a "sunny sky thunder roars" to Max's daddy, Max is trying to ... u know... show some 'affection' towards Xam. (In fact, a little too much of love..) How can?! Max is gay.. *pengsan* (I guess sodomization is the latest trend in my country now, Max is really up-to-date.)

Anyway, let's continue the story. Thus, both Max and Xam became friends and 'partners'. Initially we do not know what's Xam's name. Tried many names, eg: rocky, lucky, golden, baby, ah wong, chun choy, ahmad, fei cai, happy... He responded to none, except to stare at you in a blank face. As a result, I decided to name him Xam. It's the retrogate of Max, so Max and Xam. After a bit of training, he actually responded accurately everytime when I say 'Xam'.

Xam is a well-trained and well-taken-cared dog. How do we realized that?

#1: Although Xam was very wet and dirty when we first saw him, he has beautiful fur and clean ears

#2: Xam understood commands like 'sit', 'hand', 'come'...

#3: He is very patient and elegant when he goes out for a walk. Even when he pee and poo, you can tell that he's different from other dogs.

#4: His back legs and hip is a little crooked, the porpotion has a bit of problem, probably due to the type of floor he walk on since young is slippery. That's why his back leg looks a bit 'kang kang'.

#5: When I open the car door, straight away he'll slip into the car and sit diam diam at the back seat, which means he is used to go makan angin in the car. The worse part is to get Xam out of the car. He enjoys it too much, unwilling to leave the car.

#6: He loves to be groomed. Due to his fur is too wet and tangle, so I tried to use hairdryer to dry him. (Thanks to Valerie, I know slight knowledge on pet grooming. hehe.) He just sits still and follow whatever you wants to do. Right leg up, left ear, chest, tail.. He'll let you groom freely. Probably he's used to going pet saloon every week for his hair wash, spa routines.

See? From the evidences I've provided, it's not difficult to conclude that Xam comes from a well off family and he obviously don't know the way home. (Cause he never step out of the house without a chauffeur) hehe.

Xam is friendly, fun and has a big heart. He hardly barks at anyone, only heard once when he fought with Max to grab attention. Xam has a happy-go-lucky personality. He never keeps his frustration or sad if you scold him. (in another way, he's quite a dumb dumb. Scold also not scared!) On the other hand, he's quite naughty in the sense that he likes to chew and bite! haiyo, he's a huge destroyer. Materials from wood, metal, cotton, sponge, plastic... semua pun habis dimusnahkan. But still, he's adorable!! Heart melt when see him.. so manja... Oh ya, another of his hobby is sleep! (Just like phungy :p) The way he sleep is sooo cute. Ok, let me describe. Have you saw or ate roast pork before? Usually chinese roast a whole pork and used it as prayers purposes. When he lie down or sleep, he look exactly like the roast pork on the plate. Except that he can be a nice, warm, furry leg comforter. hehe. Cute!!!

Another of Xam's favourite activity is to play 'catch' with Max. A ball is thrown and the dogs are suppose to catch and return to the owner. Max is a champion in this game. He is fast, accurate and alert. He never missed his catch. However, Xam is always trailing behind Max and chasing around, not knowing how to catch the ball. I guess this is due to Xam's plump body (unlike Max's atheletic build) and Xam's a dumb blur dog.

In this one short week, Xam and Max play together, take walks together, eat together, sleep together, drink together, fight together, bath together, etc... at last got to know each other better. Then, this morning, I have unexpected visitors pressing doorbell. It's two guys standing at the front gate, claiming Xam is their lost dog. I was very blur (still in pajamas ler), and agreed to let Xam go with them. I thought I heard them calling him 'Roger'. Xam (roger) seems quite excited and did his signature rolling on the floor. Just like that, I let Xam go with them. I regretted a bit for not checking this matter more clearly. Should have asked him about Xam's characteristics or questioned on how they lost their dog.

Max seems to know his friend has left him and went back home. He's moody the whole day. Well, I missed Xam (Roger now) too. Missed his companion, naughtiness, beautiful coat, friendly eyes and blur look. I should have given the comb, bowl, chain, food, shampoo that we bought for him to his original owner. I missed him terribly when I look at his stuffs. Xam's one week escapades is over and I really hope that he enjoyed his stay with us. We will miss you, Xam! :)

- XOXO -